Growing Up

i am leaving now for slaughter the foes,
for struggle deeply war.
im leaving, mom, listen to me!
please pray for me to succeed..
my wings has already growing up, i will fly
to reach my destination wherever it is
i will go, mom, dont be cried
let me find my way
i wanna see and touch and listen
nevertheless there is horrible, there is some scared feeling
i will smiling and erassed the tears down
let me say my mind
i go to looking for my world, my destination
craving my place, sewing my fabric,
remember, when i navigate my river,
i love you, in all of my way

After Some Time

after some time you will understand subtle differences between hold on hand and fetter the soul, and you will understand that love isnt mean rest back and friend isnt mean safe,

and you begin to understand that kissing isnt contract and the gift isnt promise,

and you begin to recognize your defeat while rising the head and open the eyes, by toleration an adult not a sadness from kid,

and you learn  build up all of your way today because tommorow will mostly uncertain and hard to planned.

after some time you understand that sunrise will burn you if excessive.

so plant your garden and adorn your soul, dont wait someone bring you flowers.

and you understand that you can fight...

that you are actually stronger,

and you are actually valuable.

let me just put it all on the line

im not good enough at opening up and im maybe too good at being honest. i sometimes get angry for dumb reasons. and there days i will desperately needs your attention. i change my mind, i shut down, i fuck up. sometimes, really badly. just remember, i want you. i want to be with you to live our lives together.
i miss you when im sad. i miss you when im lonely. but the most i miss you is when im glad.
i miss you a little, a little too much, a little too often, a little too hard..
in all the world there's no heart for me like yours. tryin to explain why i love you is like trying to explain colors to a blind person

Next Yesterday

WebCam-ing

someday i enticed him to webcam-ing with me. i know that his hair has new design. i just curious with his new haircut therefore i enticed him to webcam-ing. and finally next yesterday i had webcam-ing with my boyfie since a long time we dont.
as usually i was being connected and open my messenger. our favorite site to webcam-ing is yahoo messenger! :D i suggested him to use skype but he deny it.

firstly he called me by ym, but it always founder. i dont know why, i think the connection got jealous with us *possible less*

my boyfie kept trying to called me by ym, but there always got any trouble. and finally, few minutes later everythings was okay :))

i saw his new hair but it's rather not clear caused by the shitty connection. overall i saw design of him. and you know what? he looks so cute with his hair which more orderly. i love it like so much :) i wanna touch and pull it up if i meet him :p

screenshoot of our webcam-ing